This is not news to most of you, but this year marks EtsyBrook’s first Christmas. And by that I mean it’s this menorah lighting, Ve’ahaftah reciting, hook-nosed-blowing haftorah reader’s first time having a legitimate excuse to gift advent calendars, ostentatiously wrap presents and deck the halls in celebration of a holiday that is related to the birth of Jesus Christ. I’m sorry, mom — my boyfriend made me do it.
I am clearly being forced into this celebration.
The Jews in the house will know what I’m talking about when I say that I have been living in a state of intense Christmas envy since about age 13. Up until then, getting eight days worth of presents in comparison to my gentile friends’ one measly morning of tearing through wrapping paper seemed like a pretty sweet deal, especially when my presents involved a sticker book one night, a stack of Lisa Frank stickers the next, and OHMIGOD OILIES!!! But for most Jewish kids, around the preteen years, the eight days of gifting comes to a halt and we start to realize that Hanukah might not be as important a holiday as our parents had previously led us to believe and — whoa — John and Maria gets to decorate a nine-foot tree and ice gingerbread cookies and unwrap sky-high piles of presents and simultaneously hate and love Christmas music?
This could have been my childhood.
(Panda Tank by sin sin, Leggings by Black Milk)
Today might as well be National Panda Day. In celebration of the release of Mists of Pandaria, World of Warcraft’s bear-centric expansion pack, we’re not all stockpiling frozen pizzas and getting ready to hunker down in our apartments until we have managed to complete all 1,300 new quests and coach our beloved pets to domination in battle. Some of us are spending our entire day enveloped in the much more productive task of trading posts about pandas on the internet.
There’s this collection of panda escape and wrestling videos from the lovely ladies over at the Mary Sue.
And this amazing Silf and Olly song from my friend Janine, that warns us of the darker side of our black and white friends.
There’s this picture collection of the newborn baby panda from the San Diego Zoo (first sent to me by Scott Jaumot), which I have left open on my desktop for the past two weeks so I can accidentally click on it at random times during the day and audibly SQUEAL from the cute.
(Photo via msn.com)
On a bleaker note, there’s also this sad news from yesterday about the death of the other baby panda recently born within the confines of the Smithsonian’s National Zoo.
Let’s pour out a forty for our little black and white comerade.
And now, my own little homage to the bears that have provided a theme upon which I have based my life and style for the past half-decade. Introducing, Disco Panda!
(Retro Gamer Leggings by Black Milk)
Today, my pants are going to party like it’s 1989, my NES is out, and I have, for fourteen seconds, stopped playing Duck Hunt to work on my double and triple clears.
You just try to beat my high score. JUST TRY.
(Green Galaxy Leggings by Black Milk, Bow by ouma)
Today’s spandex wonders have been dubbed the “Green Galaxy Leggings,” by their creators, but I have always thought they leaned a bit closer towards blue. Azure. Cerulean. Like the other galaxy pants that glitter up my gams, these leggings use a print taken directly from NASA archival photos, but bright blues and seafoam greens telegraph coral, mermaids and the ocean as much as they reference the sky. If Jacques Cousteau and Neil deGrasse Tyson had a baby, these leggings would be the gift I would bring to the shower.
Speaking of the wonders of sea and sky, I could probably fly through the air or propel a cruise ship through the ocean on this bow I’m wearing today. Should I give it a try in the name of science?
(Day of the Dead Leggings by Uptightso, Embellished Shirt by Vicious Threads)
What better way to get over hump day than with a party on your pants?
Happy skulls, flouncy front ruffles, floral headbands and sky high platforms. Just gimme a shot of tequila and I’m gonna start shaking my maracas in a conga line down the office hallway.
(Mucha Leggings by Black Milk)
Alphonse Mucha was once a Czech artist known for his distinctive and ornate art nouveau style. But from here on in, he will be known as the man who has ornately styled my legs.
The light at EtsyBrook Headquarters was not cooperating when we took our nylon close ups this morning, so there will be more mucha legging shots to come. For now, we simply give you more Mucha.
(Rectangle Druzy Necklace by Kim Delaney)
If you hadn’t noticed, we here at Etsybrook love all things galaxy. Our obsession has manifested itself in numerous way, most recently via addictive chunks of sparkling druzy jewelery. Who wouldn’t want to get intergalactic with their accessories?
Set the moon on your hand:
(Silver Titanium Druzy Ring by KatKDesigns)
Or far off planets in your lobes:
(Emerald Druzy Cabs by jenieedesigns)
It doesn’t really matter where you display your dark crystals, as long as you rock out with your rocks out. Get boozy on more druzies (I know, I can’t help it — this begs for rhymes), in our Suzie Druzy Treasury below.
(Circuit Leggings by Black Milk)
A cyber-lumberjack, of course.
(Red Galaxy Leggings by Black Milk; Vintage Denim Jumper from Persephone Vintage)
As you would expect, we here at Etsy do not believe in school uniforms. Yeah, perhaps on some level forcing all kids to wear the same itchy plaid jumpers levels the playing field; but for the creatively-inclined, uniforms can be a restrictive bind on personal expression. Who knows where I would be if not allowed to prance around in blue pleather skirts and 90’s-striped cropped tops and leopard everything in high school. (I actually think the principal may have added some rules to the dress code in my honor after I graduated. Wonder why.) Personal style is something that evolves over many years and it’s helpful if we’re allowed to work out some of the kinks in the early days, before our gainful employment and ability to attract members of the opposite sex is dependent on our ability to look put together.
All of that said, if I had to design a uniform for The EtsyBrook School of Nerdocity, this is what it would look like:
Wouldn’t wearing this make you want to learn about science? And the mysterious properties nylon? What kid wouldn’t take home the gold at the science fair in this getup? We’re is giving ourselves an A++ for this one. And now we’re going to finish our homework.